An Extra Pair of Hands

Housewife: a married woman whose main occupation is caring for her family, managing household affairs, and doing housework.

Oh. I think I might be doing it wrong.

I am a housewife, but I am not a very good one. Since having our son, I have not returned to work and I spend my day taking care of him. We have discussed my return to work, but looking at salaries v childcare costs, it just seems pointless. I do not want to work all day to afford to pay for someone else to look after my son. As he has got older and more independent, I can see that he would benefit from a few hours at nursery, socialising and interacting with other children, so have looked at part-time jobs, before becoming pregnant with our second child. I am very fortunate in that my husband is able to support our household financially, he earns enough to pay the bills and we get by. So I stay at home taking care of Ted being a ‘housewife’… but neglect to do much housework. Since being pregnant I have felt really sick and tired, and struggled to just get through a day looking after Ted, keeping us both alive, fed and clean. I have not hoovered, dusted, polished or ironed. (OK, I never iron and probably never will) I have started a job and Ted has come along and swiftly undone it, or got bored and sat shouting at me from his high chair, so often I give up because I don’t have the energy to deal with it. I have washed clothes and left them in piles around the house, I have stacked dirty plates on the kitchen side and piled up recycling in hope that by magic it will end up outside in the correct bin. My husband (the one who goes to work all day!) will come home from work and clean the kitchen, face the piles of ‘stuff’ and often cook our dinner.

See, I am a rubbish housewife.

We live in wonderful Bristol, but it is not our home town and we do not have the network of family support around us that we would if we lived closer to home. We live here for my husband’s job, and because we like it and think it is a great place to raise a family. It is our choice to be here, but in the recent weeks it been more apparent that we sometimes could do with some help nearby. So I made an SOS (Save Our Sanity) call to my Mum and asked for the help I so needed. Mum arrived for a fun weekend with us and then we had arranged for her to stay and help me out with Ted and to get on top of things. All weekend she kept reminding me “the hard work starts on Monday.” Oh good.

But it has been good… it’s been great! I have sorted the piles of clothes from around the house, organised Ted’s room, de-cluttered our messy living room, REARRANGED THE TIN CUPBOARD for heaven’s sake! My bathrooms are clean – gleaming in fact, and my kitchen is one to be proud of. My mum chopped between tidying to entertaining Ted, and it was invaluable. She took him for walks, read his fire engine book to him 7 times in a row, and sang to him pretty much the whole time she was here. All the things I should have been doing but have struggled to find the energy. Ted has been so happy and loving the attention, and I have managed to get on and Get Things Done. We even got to go out for a meal on our wedding anniversary and Mum babysat!

We really have had a great week and I feel so much better being on top of things and hope to keep it that way.

Thanks Mum, you’re the best! Xx

Are you a good housewife? Are you afraid to ask for help when you need it? Let me know by leaving me a comment below.

0 thoughts on “An Extra Pair of Hands

  1. I’m just like you – a great housewife, we survive! I’m so crap when it comes to asking for help. Too proud, why should I ask for help? Surely my family have been in my situation so they should come and offer, take the babies away from me, clean the house, do some shopping and bake me a cake. It’s easier for them if they stay away. They know I struggle and if I ever mention it they get uptight and upset and say I wished u lived closer. I’m a modern mum with everyday pressure’s (lifes so different these days) surely they know how I’m feeling after all they’ve been in my shoes. Theyve become pretty selfish! On the whole we’re doing really well now after my health issues. My parents will want me one day and guess what? I don’t live next door. Keep up the good work sarah and please don’t call yourself a rubbish housewife again xx

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